Danger Ahead: Turn Back Now!

I’ve done some dangerous things in life.

I have swam with sharks… many times… even pet them.

I’ve taken off in a two-person airplane (scary!).

The pilot, my husband, had just received his pilot’s license (very scary!).

What was I thinking?

I’ve scuba dived off a 6000-foot drop while a 14-foot hammerhead shark swam by me.

I’ve buried the needle of my speedometer (as high as it would go). I was young and stupid.

I have even looked down the barrel of a loaded gun as someone threatened me.

But none of these things compare to the most dangerous thing I have done.

What’s the most dangerous thing you have done?

Have you parachuted? Raced cars?

Tried something illegal or immoral? Fattening?

Have you done a stunt? Maybe BMX?

Have you quit your job without a way to make money or pay your bills?

We have all done something dangerous.

But none of these things compare to what’s on my mind right now.

Beware of Danger

Today, I had the opportunity to do something extremely dangerous. And I almost did!

This was not the kind of danger with a warning label or beware sign advising of tragedy ahead.

There was no opportunity to choose whether or not to engage.

This was the kind of danger that popped up out of nowhere and there I was, right in the middle of it, before I even realized it.

This is what happened.

David and I were at dinner. Alone, and not discussing business.

For us, this combination of events is as rare as finding a one-carat diamond in your back yard.

Our phones were off and we were focused on each other. Perfect moment.

Then all of a sudden, David’s phone starting buzzing. One text led to another, then a work conversation. After a few more texts, I had had enough.

I requested (ever so sweetly mind you) that he would put his phone away, but he replied, like a devil (because I am the angel in this story), that he would put the phone down in a few seconds and that it wasn’t a big deal.

Somehow, from this simple exchange, I ended up in one of the most dangerous places I have ever been.

Words Can Kill

Poisonous words that could kill our evening, mood, and potentially our relationship, were on the tip of my tongue. They were ready to roll off my lips like silk.

I paused then realized this was a truly dangerous situation.

At one time or another, we all find ourselves in a situation similar to this one.

I’m talking about a situation where we have the opportunity to assassinate our future with a few words.

These words bubble up then out of us in anger, hurt, or defense.

It’s like we are pointing a gun at our future. The safety is off and our finger is on the trigger.

Solomon spoke of situations like these. He wrote,

There are those who speak rashly, like the piercing of a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. –Proverbs 12:18 (AMP)

Our future is determined by the decisions we make right now… the words we speak at this moment… the words we speak when a loved one, boss, friend, spouse, or child pushes our buttons (whether intentionally or not) and we are ready to push back.

What’s the cost?

Think about this…

When we recognize the seemingly invisible danger of our words (those words sitting on the tip of our tongues in the heat of the moment… when our blood is boiling), we can continue down the path God has laid before us.

And its totally worth it because God’s path is better than our own.

From the fruit of his words a man shall be satisfied with good… –Proverbs 12:14 (AMP)

Are you ready?

Your next opportunity may be right around the corner!

Now its your turn. Tell me, how have you handled (or mishandled) a dangerous situation in life?

Share your experience in the comments below.

36-24-36

I wish those were my measurements.

But they are not.

What are my measurements you ask?

Nunya…

That’s none ya business.

But even if my measurements are none of your business, God is seriously into measuring things.

Don’t believe me? Here are some examples:

For God knows what’s going on. He takes the measure of everything that happens. — 1 Samuel 2:3 (MSG)

Measure out about half a pound for each day and eat it on schedule. Also measure out your daily ration of about a pint of water and drink it on schedule. — Ezekiel 4:10 (MSG)

Every pound must have sixteen ounces. Every gallon must measure four quarts. The ounce is the basic measure for both. — Ezekiel 45:11 (MSG)

I was given a stick for a measuring rod and told, “Get up and measure God’s Temple and Altar and everyone worshiping in it. Exclude the outside court; don’t measure it. — Revelation 11:1-2 (MSG)

The Angel speaking with me had a gold measuring stick to measure the City, its gates, and its wall. — Revelation 21:15 (MSG)

Why does God measure?

God measures so He knows that we know things are going according to His plan.

We’ve got to be in the know!

If we never bother to measure where we are, then we won’t know how far we have come or how close we are to getting to where we are going.

How will you ever get to where you need to be if you don’t know where you are?

The map in the mall is really helpful if you can find that little dot that says, “You are here.”

If you don’t take the time to look for it, then you’re probably going to end up walking in circles.

How do you get more out of life if you don’t know how much you have now?

Stop and take a mental measurement of your love, life, money, happiness, and contentment. Now think about where you want to be in those areas.

Which way are you headed?

If we don’t know exactly where we are and where we are headed, then the first move and every move after that are potentially steps in the wrong direction.

A person of excellence examines who and what they are in every relationship and then plans, adjusts and explains accordingly.

This includes difficult times when we are scared of the answers, as well as when things are going great and we don’t think we need to know (because we just know that things are great).

Be ready for success… some of the most treacherous times we’ll face are those when things are going well.

Many have passed the test of failure, but few have passed the test of success.

Start Measuring Today

What can you start measuring right now?

I measured myself when I was pregnant. I wanted to see the growth. Then I measured after I had the baby because I wanted to see the shrinkage.

When we started our church, I counted people every week. That way, I knew exactly when we started growing.

I’ll leave you with this: Measuring is not the monster of comparison.

It is a point from which to start each new year, quarter, month, week or day. Use it to your advantage.

What are you going to start measuring today?

A Child's Imagination

Just ask any four year old.

In a moment, they could be on the moon.

Or performing a death defying act…

Or saving hundreds of people from a burning building (in the middle of your living room).

So what does imagination have to do with where you want to be in life?

Imagination determines how we view a situation.

The Bible says,

Now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.
– Genesis 11:6 (KJV)

We all hear things like, “You have to see it to be it.”

Or, “You are today where you thought you would be yesterday.”

And these statements are true (even biblical).

Truth is, we have to see it with our faith, and sometimes that can be a little uncomfortable.

Isaiah 54:2 says,

Enlarge the place of your tent, and let the curtains of your habitations be stretched out; spare not; lengthen your cords and strengthen your stakes…
– Amplified Version

This tells me that we can’t live comfortably and expect our lives to be excellent. Pause and think about that for a second.

We must always strive to live outside our comfort zone. We should stretch every area of our life.

Our love walk, our giving, our workplace, our home life…

This means every area!

Your imagination also has everything to do with your goals.

Without goals, you don’t know where to go and you can’t tell when you arrive.

A life without goals is like taking off for a trip and not knowing where you are going.

We have to know where we are going in order to develop a plan to get there.

I live in St. Louis, Missouri. If I get in my car, then start driving east only to decide about 5 hours into the trip that I really want to go to L.A., I will quickly realize I’ve wasted a lot of time and energy. I should have determined my destination before starting the car.

The great thing is this: You can get exactly to where you need to be from where you are right now (regardless of where that is).

Whether its L.A., Mexico, the next level, a higher income bracket, more quality time at home, or a deeper relationship with your Heavenly Father… you can start now!

Start Where You Are

If you want to be like most people, you can do what most people do.

Most people…

• Never set goals
• Don’t know where they’re going
• Daydream about being discovered while sitting idly watching the world go by

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The world makes a way for the man who knows where he’s going.”

And to know where you are going, you have to set a goal.

You have to set goals then strive to reach them because you are only going to possess what you are willing to pursue.

One thing is for sure, if you don’t pursue it – you won’t possess it.

How to Set Your Goals

1. Use timelines.
   Without them, you don’t know when you should arrive.
2. Make goals measurable.
   Otherwise, how do you know when you are almost there?
3. Be specific.
   No one likes to shoot in the dark.
4. Write it down.
   It makes it difficult to back out on yourself. A little positive pressure can be a good thing.

The next three tips, for what not to do when setting goals, are just as important as what you do do.

• Don’t compete with people.
  Compete against mediocrity. Beating someone doesn’t make us better. Beating the norm does.
• Don’t let economy/worldly factors limit your goals.
  Either we live according to what God has to say about us, or what the world has to say about us. Join me in choosing to live by what God has to say about us.
• Don’t try to be what you can’t see in the mirror yet.
  Can’t see yourself there? Even in your imagination? Then don’t go yet.

You have to see it to be it!

See it first. Wait until you can see yourself in that higher level of success before you attempt to go there.

My challenge to you: Attempt to see it now!

Use your imagination. See it with your eyes of faith.

If you can do that, you can do anything!

If you see it, speak it. Tell me, what are you going to shoot for this year?

Did somebody do you wrong?

Somebody did me wrong.

I mean… down and dirty.

They asked me if they could take something from me.

I said no. Then they did it anyway.

They even talked bad about me in the process.

Ouch! I thought they were my friend. That hurts even worse.

This isn’t a recent event – otherwise it’s possible that someone might think that I am talking about them. No, this happened a while back. Yet, I still remember it clearly.

You see, after it happened I didn’t call them and tell them what they did.

I didn’t ask them why they did it.

I didn’t correct them.

I didn’t even give them a piece of my mind (I need all the pieces I have).

What I Should Have Said?

I’ve shared this story, more than once, as an example of how to work though workplace differences.

Most of the time, this is the most shocking part of the story.

After all, its only natural to want to pick up the phone and say, “What the heck were you thinking?”

Or, “Were you thinking at all?”

That makes sense, right?

Let’s review: They asked. We said no. They did it anyway.

Come to think about it, they should be expecting a phone call…

But are they?

Probably not.

You see, they aren’t expecting a phone call (or any other type of confrontation) because they don’t think they did anything wrong.

And if we told them they were wrong, we would just hurt ourselves.

A wise man once said:

If you reason with an arrogant cynic, you’ll get slapped in the face; confront bad behavior and get a kick in the shins. So don’t waste your time on a scoffer; all you’ll get for your pains is abuse. But if you correct those who care about life, that’s different—they’ll love you for it! — Proverbs 9:7-8 (MSG)

Basically, if a jerk is a jerk (and let’s face it, sometimes people are), it’s not our job to correct them.

Not only is it not our job… it makes us self-righteous and pain seeking.

Not worth it!

However, for as many jerks as there are out there, there are just as many people who are looking to be better friends.

These are your true friends.

They are the ones you can share your feelings and coach to a better place in life.

So, the next time “somebody done somebody wrong” – be sure you know who and what you are dealing with so you don’t just deal yourself more pain.

How did you handle a recent time when someone hurt you?

Let me know in the comments. I want to hear all about it.

Ladies: Are you ready to dance in the New Year?

Meet us at the Earth City Campus on January 20th for a night of fun with your girlfriends.

Bring your friends

We’ll have professional dance instructors teaching you Jazz, Hip Hop, Salsa, Zumba, and Line Dancing for free.

For more information:
Earth City Campus
3590 Rider Trail South
Earth City, MO 63045
314-635-2000

Childcare is provided.

Better days are ahead!

Last year was an amazing year.

It provided many positive and a few not so positive experiences.

I’m thankful for each one.

After all, without experience, we would never learn.

Today, I want to share with you eleven things I learned in 2011.

Some of the these I learned by observing others. Others I figured out the hard way.

Self Confidence

We all want to be needed and need to be wanted.

No matter how much you build up those around you, you can do it more. Just think about how many days we doubt ourselves and don’t tell anyone.

Sow seeds of self-confidence in others and watch the harvest in our own lives. The best part is you don’t even have to carry these seeds in your briefcase.

Family

Family is more important than almost anything. Putting a brick on your kid’s head won’t keep them from growing up!

Even as fast as we have grown, we’re never too big for our momma to hold.

Hint: call your momma.

Our babies will never be too big to hold (even if they are 6’3” and 220 lbs).

Self

An important part of life is taking time for yourself. It’s not selfish. It’s necessary for sanity!

I repeat – no feeling bad for taking some time for you!

If we don’t take care of ourselves, then we can’t take care of anyone else.

Entertainment

It’s okay to get up and walk out of a bad movie. It won’t hurt anyone’s feelings.

Buying the ticket did not obligate us to that time. Go see a different movie, or go out to eat, or go shopping and enjoy it!

Attitude

Patience isn’t a virtue… it’s a must.

An angry outburst never made anyone feel better (the shouter or the listener).

Oh… and I wouldn’t trade a truly laugh out loud moment for $100!

Gravity

What was once up starts, remarkably, tugging down (even in places I didn’t know could go down).

I should be okay with that. Next year, I hope to blog that I am. But this year, I am fighting it tooth and nail (the only two places that are currently not being tugged).

Helping Someone Else Have a Good Day

As bad as we want someone to make our day with good news… everyone else wants that too.

Giving someone good news about something as small as their outfit can make a huge difference in their day.

Chit Chat

Words weigh a ton… whether they are the right words or the wrong ones.

Whether we mean them or not.

Words said in jest, without a second thought, or in passing, can crush someone.

At work

We usually think we are ready for something before we are–that will challenge us right there to take an honest personal assessment.

No matter your job, current challenge, or where you are in life, you can love it if you want to.

Obviously work is full of challenges!

Friendship

A real friend is difficult to find and is worth solid gold. We don’t have to talk every day, every week, or even every month.

They encourage one another to be all that they can be and when they do well, we don’t get jealous (and they are never jealous of us either).

A true friend has permission to speak into our life and never has to apologize for what they say.

They even have permission to let us know when those jeans don’t do us any justice. Thank you friends!

God

Life without Him isn’t worth living.

I have known this for years, but what I am realizing is that I still go minutes and hours a day without talking to Him. This is really still living life without Him.

I want God in every part of every minute of my life.

What did you learn?

What is something you learned this year, either in your life or by watching others, that was important enough for you to remember and write here?

This is your chance to let us learn from what you have learned.

So happy right now!

I prefer sushi, but it is amazing that I have a choice.

Happiness is my home with heat and air conditioning.

The indoor plumbing is a major bonus (especially during winter in the Midwest).

Happiness is knowing God has a purpose for my life.

The more I follow Him, the more it becomes clear.

Happiness is having two healthy children. Even though they leave a trail like a tornado in the house.

Happiness is my daughter falling asleep with her head on my shoulder. I’m even fond of the drool stain she leaves on my sleeve.

Happiness is my husband sleeping next to me. We will leave out the snoring and interesting smells here.

Happiness 101

Happiness is possible wherever we are in life, but I wasn’t always there (in that happy place).

So what changed?

Let me tell you… the secret to happiness in life, marriage, single life, relationships, and in the workplace – it is being thankful for the things that are good (Philippians 4:8).

Now I know… it might not all be good, but if you take a moment to stop and think about it, you will discover a whole lot that is good no matter what is going on in your life right now.

Mesh your thoughts with God’s way of thinking. He is a happy God. He sits in the heavens and laughs (and it is not even at us).

Do you want to be happy right now?

Its easier than you think… so let’s do it!

I challenge you to write down 10 things that are good in your life then share a few of them in the comments below.

No matter what is going on in your life, make it your mission today to make this list. I promise, if you take the time to focus on what’s good in your life, you’ll be much happier.

A love that lasts forever.

I was in my office the other day talking with a trio of bright, single people.

They were thin and good-looking.

They had great personalities and an even better social life.

But then, the conversation drifted…

One person mentioned how lonely the single life could be, then the others chimed in that they felt the same way.

I was pretty shocked to think that these high caliber singles (with very together lives) felt this way!

I mean, from the outside, it looked as if the world was their oyster–foot loose and fancy free!

They seemed ready to pick up and go at a moment’s notice.

It never occurred to me that they were looking for a reason to pick up and go…

Get Hitched?

Being married for 14 years with two kids, I don’t really remember that feeling of loneliness.

I’m sure I experienced it at times. I recall it … vaguely–like in a dream.

But at this point in my fast-paced life–juggling my schedule, my husband’s schedule, and the schedules of two social kids in more activities than I can count on two hands; I dream of just a few moments to myself… to do what I want to do… and when I want to do it–in peace and quiet!

Talk about a dream… like the title of that children’s book, Just Five Minutes of Peace!

Greener Pastures

It’s funny how we desire what we don’t have! No matter what it is.

Lonely single people and married people dreaming of alone time…

You would figure one of these two scenarios would make us happy, but that’s just it!

Relationships will never make us happy.

Finding a mate will not make us happy.

If we have a spouse, it is not up to them to make us happy.

Rather, it is up to us to find our happiness in Christ.

Now you might be thinking… I’d love to do that, but how?

The Perfect Relationship

Paul said in the Bible:

Actually, I don’t have a sense of needing anything personally. I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.
–Phillipians 4:11-13 (MSG (emphasis mine))

The secret to every relationship is our relationship with the Greater One. If we want any other relationship to mesh (including our relationship with ourselves), we have to develop a relationship with God.

Without trust in Him, we will doubt the purpose of our existence.

Without knowing who He is, we can not be assured that His plans for us are to give us a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11)

Without a relationship with Him, we do not know that we can do all things through Him.

Without talking to Him and hearing His voice, we don’t have access to the encouragement that assures us that the victory is ours and the battle is the Lord’s. (2 Chronicles 20:15)

Relationship Lessons

When I look back on my life, I wonder how I ever made it through some of the times when I strayed from Him. Its no wonder those times in my life weren’t pretty. I had left the relationship.

That may be where you are today–a little lost in life.

You might be wondering if the decisions you made were the right ones. Or perhaps, you’re wondering if you are in the right place, with the right person, and at the right time.

I have good news for you!

God never denies us relationship with Him.

Commitment

You can turn back to God in repentance and He will accept you instantly… allowing the relationship restoration to begin. He never leaves you. He is faithful.

Let’s take a moment to commit our lives to Him right now by praying this prayer:

God, every day I need you. Sometimes I fall away, get distracted or purposefully do my own thing instead of doing what I know You want me to do. I’m sorry!

Right now I recommit my life to You and realign my purpose with the destiny for which You have created me.

I know You love me, and God, I love you. I will serve You! Speak to my heart the way that I should go and Lord I will listen and obey. Amen.

Now, that relationship is right. It is meshed. It is folded back together in such a way that He can’t see the separation any longer.

And we have taken the first step toward… happy.

Our Christmas Tree

I would move the little snowflake, day by day, one step closer to the goal of 25 (which is where my little calendar stopped).

As a child, it seemed like the tree would be in the house for ages.

The gifts under the tree were there just to tempt me to peak inside.

I have to admit I did at least a time or two. Sorry mom.

Pressure of the Season

Now I hear 19 days until Christmas and I beak out in a slight panic!

Cards to send out, goodies to bake, lights to hang, house to decorate, programs to attend, tree to put up, parties to be seen at, presents to buy… and wrap.. and bow… and label… and ship.

I think I am breaking a stress sweat just thinking about it. Unfortunately for me – it doesn’t look anything like a glow!

The preacher’s house can’t be the only house on the street with no Christmas lights! Talk about pressure!

Okay, you might not relate. You might hang loose until December 24, pick up a few gifts that look like they will work and toss them in some gift bags. And you are also probably a single male in his twenties. Just sayin…

The pressure to make the season magic. The pressure to not disappoint. The pressure to make it what we remember as children. Were my parents this busy?

I can see how, in this season, it is easy to lose sight of the purpose – the reason for the season.

Reason for the Season

In Luke 2 it talks about some shepherds on a hillside having an angelic encounter and hearing the news of the Savior being born. The angel said “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people.”

Then the shepherds hurried to find the Christ child. They left the busyness of their job. They didn’t care about party clothes or décor. They just hurried to find Christ.

And once they found Him, they told everyone what had happened. Profound.

Go Tell It on the Mountain

I find each year that I scale back a little more on the hub bub of the season and focus a little more on what the shepherds did.. telling everyone what had happened.

The shepherds really got it. They latched on. They celebrated His birth in the best way. And they didn’t even have icicle lights hanging on their houses!

This year our family is spending over twenty nights preparing for and performing in a production that truly tells everyone what Christ did for us.

This is a different kind of a tradition than I was raised in – but I couldn’t be more proud of my children as they participate every year. This has become our own Christmas tradition… celebrating according to Luke 2:17.

Join Us for Believe

There are only a two opportunities left for you to see what we have been working on. All the original dates have sold out (the tickets are free).

If you are in the St. Louis area, and you have not signed up for tickets to our Christmas production, there are a handful of tickets remaining for Wednesday, December 7 and Saturday, December 10.

These shows are an excellent opportunity for you to tell someone the real story of Christmas.

Click here to get your tickets now before they are all gone.

Help us tell someone the good news!

Any leftovers?

I’m stuffed!!!

I mean, who didn’t eat too much for Thanksgiving dinner?

I am looking for a show of hands, and nope – no one raised theirs.

I am aware that this is a blog and I can’t actually see you, but you get my point.

I am not, actually, thinking about my stomach at this moment.

If you know me, this is rare because I really appreciate a good meal. But I am talking about my life.

I have a nice, full life.

Now you might be thinking…

• How rude to flaunt like that
• I wish my life was full
• My life is full too, or
• Full? If my life got anymore full I would pop!

Actually, technically…

Depending on the day you ask me and the place I am in (at the moment), I might not always answer this question the same way.

But it is not that my life is any more or less full, blessed, or amazing on any particular day.

It may be that I have momentarily forgotten all that I am thankful for.

Do you ever do that?

Girl Talk

I was sitting with a couple of my single friends the other day. We were just “girl-chatting” about life and they were telling me how life as a single lady can be a little, well… lonely.

I laughed. Out loud. And hard. Right in front of them. Then I explained why…

I told them that as a wife and mom of two in a busy household, sometimes I just would close my eyes for a moment and wish I could get just five minutes alone without someone pulling on me!

Isn’t it interesting how the human psyche finds a way to attempt to be discontent no matter what condition that it is in?

I guess that is why the Bible says,

Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. — Colossians 3:15 (MSG)

Cultivate Thankfulness

Thankfulness is something that has to be cultivated.

Cultivated? Yep, that’s what it says!

What does that even mean?

Well according to the online dictionary that I just looked up – it means:

1. To promote the growth of,
2. To nurture; foster,
3. To form and refine.

We have to promote the growth of thankfulness in our lives. Nuture it like a baby. Make time to see that it is paid attention to. Refine it and make it more perfect.

There is a relationship between thankfulness and peace. And who couldn’t use more peace?

All the moms and dads reading this blog just said Amen out loud (hopefully not in an inconvenient place)!

So this week, with the official Thanksgiving holiday (with it’s turkey, pumpkin and stretchy pants we wear to dinner) behind us, let’s not leave the act of searching for reasons to give thanks.

Let’s promote being thankful and deserving in our lives. And let’s see if that doesn’t lead to a life more full of peace.

I’ll Start

I am thankful my children are healthy.

I am thankful my husband loves me.

I am thankful that my home has heat and air conditioning.

I am thankful that I have a job. And most the time I love my job!

What are you thankful for?