What is Your Love Language?

When we were first married, I would go around “half-ticked off” at David.

“Would you please just HELP ME? I have SO much to do! I’m working so hard and you’re sitting on the couch!”

My love language is “Acts of Service”. If you REALLY love me…then you’ll take out the trash! lol

I would gripe at him instead of filling up HIS “love tank” by saying stuff like, “THANK YOU for helping! It’s so important to me! You do SUCH a good job loading the dishwasher!”

You see, David’s love language is “Words of Affirmation.”  He doesn’t really feel loved or appreciated unless you say it with words.

So, when it comes to my husband, I usually get MORE of what I BRAG on!

If you haven’t done a Love Language iConnect yet, you should. Or, at the very least, read the book.

“The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman will change your life…for REAL! I’m not overpromising. It changed the way I thought about a lot of things.

So the bottom line is this. We can NEVER fill up someone else’s “love tank” the way WE want to be loved. (That was a big thing for me to learn.)

Here are the Five Love Language Categories from the book. Which one would mean the most to you?

  • #1 Words of Affirmation
  • #2 Quality Time
  • #3 Receiving Gifts
  • #4 Acts of Service
  • #5 Physical Touch

Finding the right person is important. But, so is BEING THE RIGHT PERSON…the person God wants us to be!

Wishing you LOVE!


Which one of the Five Love Languages best describes the way you want to be loved? I told you mine…now tell me yours.

7 Responses

  1. Priscilla

    This is so important to me that I reflect back, occasionally and I try to nurture my own love language, as I am single. I did not know this with my first marriage and it was a disaster. Began with my 2nd marriage and was widowed, but I learned something in the 3 months we were together. Looking forward to walking it out when the time comes again for my mate. Walking it out now with my children, friends, co-workers, etc. Thanks Pastor.

  2. Kimberly Poole

    I Love that You shared this! My 1st one is Acts of Service, 2nd one is quality Time 3rd is Touch. I read this book 2 years ago and One of my friends says that is Not Biblical, so i have not been using it when I talk to people about relationships. but i know it works. you have to Intentionally know the other person. Do you have any scripture references? Please respond…

  3. Jenifer j

    I remember the first time i did this test. I was in a school with 20 other students. We had to guess which we thought was each others love languages. When it came to my turn, the group unanimously voted verbally acts of service. I have never heard such a shock factor when i told them it was quality time then words of affirmation.

    I was the girl to get it all done in church. But little did people recognize my true love language as so many appreciated all the things i did so that their jobs could be easier, they only saw me for what i did, not who i was. As i have noticed over the years is that sometimes people are strong in a certain love language because deep inside they want to receive it in return.

    It also amazed me how much people appreciated me easing their load but didnt take the time.to realize how by serving them it costed me. Soon i was just a ‘jobbit’ – a gurl who did stuff for others but no one wanted to get to know me for me, just what i could do for them.

    Since that day shocking my classmates, i now try to incorporate all five love languages in my day to day as i know that when i extend love i receive love in return.

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