A while back, David and I were prepping together to preach on relationships. But, things just werenβt going as planned. We werenβt seeing eye-to-eye on some dumb stuff.
The more we tried to discuss thingsβ¦the more the temperature seemed to be going up in the room.
This would be a good time to try a technique that Iβd been reading about. I looked David straight in the eyes and said,
βI know that youβre aggravated. I donβt know what youβre aggravated about. But if itβs me, I need to know so I can change. Because what I really want to do, right now, is hug you and have everything be ok.β
He looked at me kind of puzzled and said, βAm I AGGRAVATED???β
βYeahβ¦ you are,βI said, βbecause youβre getting very LOUD and really passionate!β
He said, βThatβs just me EVERY DAY!βThatβs his communication style.
When you choose a mate, you canβt take somebody and decide to change them. We canβt even change ourselves, so what makes us think we can change SOMEBODY ELSE?
We think, βHeβs ALMOST perfectβ¦I bet I can change those last few things.β It never works!
I read a 15-year study that followed couples about to get married. It seems the amount of happiness they felt before marriage was EXACTLY THE SAME as after.
No CHANGE!
Our happiness is not our partnerβs responsibility. Likewise, we canβt FORCE someone else to be happy.
Happiness is a CHOICE we make that comes from within ourselves; TRUE JOY and contentment that ultimately comes from our relationship with God!
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who you hoped would CHANGEβ¦ but didnβt? (Show me a raised hand emoji if you have.)
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Donβt miss the FINAL WEEK of the βHe Said, She Saidβ series. David and I will be preaching together this weekend, so you never know what might happen!
11 comments
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Yes!!!!!
Love you guys and thank you. Wish I could see you in person but I live approximately an hour away and it’s difficult in Ft Pierce. Have a beautiful blessed day
You both always have what I need when I need it! This just happen this morning. love my pastors!!
π€πΌYes Pastor and I just ended a relationship for that very reason…
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Thanks for the good word!
Amen and Amen. I too am a witness after 51-years of marriage from age 18 thru 70 years of age my relationship with my spouse has changed. My life is of thankfulness and contentment. His life at 71 want him to believe I’m yet somewhere between 18-30.
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