A while back, David and I were prepping together to preach on relationships. But, things just weren’t going as planned. We weren’t seeing eye-to-eye on some dumb stuff.
The more we tried to discuss things…the more the temperature seemed to be going up in the room.
This would be a good time to try a technique that I’d been reading about. I looked David straight in the eyes and said,
“I know that you’re aggravated. I don’t know what you’re aggravated about. But if it’s me, I need to know so I can change. Because what I really want to do, right now, is hug you and have everything be ok.”
He looked at me kind of puzzled and said, “Am I AGGRAVATED???”
“Yeah… you are,”I said, “because you’re getting very LOUD and really passionate!”
He said, “That’s just me EVERY DAY!”That’s his communication style.
When you choose a mate, you can’t take somebody and decide to change them. We can’t even change ourselves, so what makes us think we can change SOMEBODY ELSE?
We think, “He’s ALMOST perfect…I bet I can change those last few things.” It never works!
I read a 15-year study that followed couples about to get married. It seems the amount of happiness they felt before marriage was EXACTLY THE SAME as after.
Our happiness is not our partner’s responsibility. Likewise, we can’t FORCE someone else to be happy.
Happiness is a CHOICE we make that comes from within ourselves; TRUE JOY and contentment that ultimately comes from our relationship with God!
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who you hoped would CHANGE… but didn’t? (Show me a raised hand emoji if you have.)
Don’t miss the FINAL WEEK of the “He Said, She Said” series. David and I will be preaching together this weekend, so you never know what might happen!